There have been some GREAT questions asked by readers in connection to some of the various topics that I have posted about on the blog. Those topics again are: Parenting, Adoption, Organization, & Decor.
I love to respond to questions asked in the comment section. Just a side note: If you leave your comment as “Anonymous” I have no way of contacting you with my reply unless you check back where you originally left your comment. It has also been really fun to answer questions and interact on An Inviting Home’s Facebook page.
Like many things, one post often leads to another post, so, many questions that come up are often answered in future posts. However, I also realized that it might be helpful to answer some questions in a Q & A collection because after all I only post about each topic once a week and you can’t cover a whole lot about parenting or organization when you only post about it 4x a month. Not to mention that I am constantly learning some amazing ideas and tips from all of you! I wanted to create a space that you could also comment answering questions if you have suggestions or tips to add! I would even guess that your answer is going to be more helpful than mine! 😉
Here we go!
Our first ever…How would you answer?!?
Question #1: Since your kids share a room, how do you get them to fall asleep at night? Our 2 share a room (out of necessity) & usually talk for a while after lights out.
Answer: I think this goes by personal preference. I dream of the day where our kids will chat at night with each other before bed (like best friends kind of chatting) and then blissfully fall to sleep in a timely manner. The reality, however, is that right now most of the time it is our youngest daughter wanting to chat ALL night and our oldest daughter coming crying to us because she is so tired and just wants to sleep. We have set the precedent with the kids that once they are tucked in and lights out there is no talking. If we hear talking, Sam or I will take turns going into their rooms and reminding them to be quiet (some nights we get our daily exercise by going up and down the stairs so many times and other nights you can hear a pin drop.) Whichever child was talking normally gets a consequence like losing a smiley face (they love to tell you who was responsible for talking!) When it is a community party in there then we tell them that we are adding five minutes to their alarms.
Question #2: I was wondering if you read any books on foster care/adoption that you found helpful before your family grew?
Answer: I read a few, although I will willingly admit that I am not much of a reader…at least in large quantities. The books I read were, “The Connected Child” by Karyn Purvis & “Handbook on Thriving as an Adoptive Family: Real-Life Solutions to Common Challenges” by David & Renee Sanford…both of these were really good. Does anyone else have any good books to recommend? My biggest suggestion, if you are considering foster care/adoption, is to get involved in any support groups that might meet in your area. Whether they are foster parents/adoptive parents that meet through a church or your county. It has been very helpful for us to have people who have gone before us who are willing to take time to answer our questions. Things vary so much from State and County that it really makes a different to connect with people right in your area and you will learn SO much!
Question #3: When your older kids are home from school, do you have them rest for the full 2 hours ’til the music comes on?
Answer: With our current school schedule they don’t get home until late afternoon after the younger kids have already napped. That means that they don’t have any type of quiet time during the week. On the weekends, however, our two oldest kids have a quiet time for the full 2 hours while the little ones are napping. They split up into different rooms…one might go downstairs into the family room or one chills on the couch in the living room. Our son will usually take his LEGOS out of his room and grab some books to read as well. We just try to emphasize that it is “quiet” time. They are familiar with the time frame so most of the time they end up curling up on the couch towards the end and might fall asleep. They know that based on our activities for a weekend and their attitudes that at any point they could be asked to nap on their beds during this time and that staying up is a “privilege.” Sometimes we pull the, we know your tired and you need sleep now card, but most of the time they chill on their own quietly for the full two hours.
Question #4: When it comes to adopting and foster care is there anything that you wish someone had told you that you had to find out for yourselves?
Answer: I am actually super grateful that people were very honest with us up front about how hard things might be. They mentioned all of the paperwork, and the difficult days. Even though we knew days would be hard we were also told that it is SO GOOD! Man, they weren’t kidding! From seeing God totally work to bring families together, to celebrating, to experiencing those funny moments, to just being a family! From the very beginning we didn’t want to assume that our love was going to transform a child and make everything butterflies & roses. Any child that needs to be adopted has gone through significant things to come to that point. We have been so blessed to just walk beside our kids and smile at all of the ways that God is continuing to work in their lives and ours as He knits our family together. I think going into it expecting it to be hard made it so incredibly awesome to experience so many joy-filled days. Now that I think about it though, I didn’t come across anyone that mentioned weight gain as a possibility…that might have been helpful to be watching for. 🙂
What can you add to these answers?